ineke.co.uk

Hmm. I think there are only about 50 genuine marchers here. The rest of us are Russian bots. #PeoplesVoteMarch

— Stephen McGann (@StephenMcGann) March 23, 2019

If my husband tried sleeping on my side of the bed I would either smother him with a pillow or divorce him.
This swapping business is utter madness. https://t.co/lQnEtKhquR

— Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) March 23, 2019

Just walked past a neighbour washing his car and I didn’t say “You’ve missed a bit” or “You can do mine next!” and now I’m questioning whether I’m even British.

— Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) March 24, 2019

Honestly, even if I read a library book, I always feel compelled to buy it because books on my shelves feel like trophies of worlds that I've conquered and can revisit anytime I want.

— 🌙 cait the cryptid (@chaptercviii) March 24, 2019

A mouse has been captured tidying up bits and bobs in a pensioner's shed.

Stephen McKears from Gloucestershire says he couldn't understand how small metal items were returning to their box every night.

So he set up a special night-time camera to find out 🐭 📹 pic.twitter.com/Gn1gvhTown

— ITV News Central (@ITVCentral) March 19, 2019

Families who bought popcorn, sweets and drinks at the cinema rather than the mum smuggling in Panda Pops, a bag of Cola Cubes and some Aniseed Twist. https://t.co/LICgUbAyHa

— Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) March 24, 2019

What Uri Geller doesn’t realise is that I staged Brexit in the first place.

— Derren Brown (@DerrenBrown) March 25, 2019

Should've gone to Düsseldorf? #Shouldve https://t.co/XXSCbZou3R

— Specsavers (@Specsavers) March 25, 2019

Boris Johnson seems to have forgotten that once Moses’ people were “let go” they spent the next 40 years wandering in the wilderness, searching for the promised land… pic.twitter.com/zNe3VPCYPl

— Larry the Cat (@Number10cat) March 25, 2019

Meeting at Chequers today:

Theresa May
Boris Johnson
Dominic Raab
Jacob Rees-Mogg
David Davis
Iain Duncan Smith
Damian Green

None of them would make it to the end of a Willy Wonka factory tour.

— James Melville 🚜 (@JamesMelville) March 24, 2019

Hey @British_Airways, we have a present for you 👀 pic.twitter.com/m3K9ZNk0Ew

— Ryanair (@Ryanair) March 25, 2019

Now that's an intro.pic.twitter.com/kjg0tnZPmj

— Jeremy Vine (@theJeremyVine) March 27, 2019

Rees-Mogg wishes to vote again (for a third time) because the information he has access to and the circumstances have changed and he’s changed his mind. Why is this not an arguement for also putting the final deal to a public vote to assess if they agree with his change of mind? https://t.co/R1ZgKga0CM

— Brian Cox (@ProfBrianCox) March 26, 2019

At least we can all agree on one thing. It’s great news that they’re adding Double Deckers to ‘Miniature Heroes’ this year.

— Richard Osman (@richardosman) March 27, 2019

And yet again, the Conservative party is making it all about themselves. What an exhausting bunch of drama queens.

— Dara Ó Briain (@daraobriain) March 27, 2019

Just wondering how the country would be looking right now if Ed Miliband didn't eat that bacon sandwich in 2014?

— King Charles III (parody) (@Charles_HRH) March 27, 2019

If even NOW we're THIS stuck, and things are – you know – not as TERRIBLE as they could be, can we just pretend this never happened?

— Danny Wallace (@dannywallace) March 27, 2019

Only in England: Janeites against Brexit #PutItToThePeople pic.twitter.com/9LjdqDgg24

— Nick Cohen (@NickCohen4) March 23, 2019

People’s Vote: 268 votes
Customs Union: 264 votes
(both with cabinet not even voting)
Theresa May’s deal: 242 votes

Government conclusion:
It’s obvious we must go for Theresa May’s deal again.#indicativevotes

— David Schneider (@davidschneider) March 27, 2019

Has anyone considered solving Brexit through one of those Twitter world cups?

— Jonathan Healey (@SocialHistoryOx) March 27, 2019

So glad it was Simon McCoy who got to break the news of the Düsseldorf flight mishap pic.twitter.com/9dC3lgGXSL

— BritishTelly (@TellyBritish) March 25, 2019

Imagine explaining to future historians that ITV2 was different to ITV1+1.

— Richard Osman (@richardosman) March 28, 2019

As Theresa May offers to quit if Tories accept her Brexit deal, Labour MPs say if she takes Corbyn with her then so will they.

— Have I Got News For You (@haveigotnews) March 28, 2019

Probably OK until 12th April? pic.twitter.com/RqrjiK5Nui

— Kay Burley (@KayBurley) March 28, 2019

Just watched Teresa May give that little speech. I do believe she's trying to do the right thing. Of course I don't agree that the country actually wants Brexit anymore, but we shouldn't get sucked into the narrative that she's the evil architect of it.

We should pray for her.

— Martin Saunders (@martinsaunders) March 29, 2019

"Bizarrely"https://t.co/kAhAHNEO3O pic.twitter.com/mNjkBAmOhR

— Richard Chapman (@SelsdonChapman) March 28, 2019

I see @Fortnums are wisely hedging their bets in these turbulent times for our nation … pic.twitter.com/2oi1kqMPvV

— Stephen Fry (@stephenfry) March 30, 2019

2016 – 28th March 2019:
People have had enough of experts!

29 March 2019: [tiny, tiny voice] Maybe we should ask some experts.https://t.co/ziOHw6tdD7

— David Schneider (@davidschneider) March 29, 2019